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Streaming Aliens vs. Predator - Requiem Online

Mercredi, août 4th, 2010
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Movie Title: Aliens vs. Predator - Requiem
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When AVP went into production fans of both the Alien and Predator movies were very excited, but a little hope was lost when it was announced Paul WS Anderson was the writer/director; but what really got fans going crazy was when the rating was PG-13. While one cannot deny there were flaws with AVP it had more to do with the writing than anything else. Anderson’s scripts often feel like an early draft rather than final shooting script. All the Alien and Predator movies were R-rated and no doubt AVP should have as well, but when all was said and done the PG-13 rating isn’t what hurt AVP. Yes it could have used more gore and action, but the problems again were with the writing.

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With AVP-R announced without Paul Anderson being involved and the movie being made with an R-Rating fans were once again excited. And to be totally honest after watching AVP-R I think I’d much rather have Paul Anderson involved. AVP-R was a rather poor movie, while there was potential without Anderson I really think we would have been better off with him.

The biggest problem with AVP-R is the lighting. Daniel Pearl was the DP and from what I have seen from him I have liked. He did the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre so right there he gets my respect, but the lighting here was terrible. There was more gore than AVP, but we can’t see it! I don’t know if Daniel Pearl was to blame or if it was Colin & Greg Strause who are the directors are too blame. Since Pearl is the DP I have to blame him. Watching this movie at times is sort of like watching a movie with your eyes closed. That was the biggest problem here, but not the only problem.

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The screenplay by Shane Salerno was terrible. There were far too many characters to keep track of and all were so poorly written and lack any depth at all. AVP-R is the type of movie that when all is said and done you’ll be hard pressed to remember the names of any of the characters. The script was really poor. It’s like Shane Salerno didn’t even bother to try. We have the fan base for the Alien and Predator movies and well they’ll see anything we spit out. Once again Hollywood treats us like idiots.

Directors Colin & Greg Strause fail at brining any suspense and tension and with the terrible lighting not much of a surprise their scenes lack any of that. The action scenes are decent, but again since we can barley see them they fail at brining any excitement. There were a couple of solid scenes, but not nearly enough to salvage this movie. Had I actually been able to see what was happening maybe AVP-R wouldn’t have failed as much as it did; by no means would this be a great movie, but slightly better. The final act is the worst offender; the scenes in the hospital for the climax are so dark that if you have any interest left in the movie by this point you’ll probably lose it.

AVP-R proved that the rating of AVP had nothing to do with its failure. Would an R-rating have made AVP better? Odds are yes very slightly better, but no way would it have been great. Like I said earlier the PG-13 rating didn’t hurt AVP as much as the writing and this movie proved that. AVP-R was R-rated and wasn’t as good as AVP, which was average at best. A lot has changed over the years, back in the 70s and 80s many movies were butchered by the MPAA and if released now most of these titles would clear and R-rating with ease and some would feature minor cuts and not be totally butchered. If AVP was released back in the 80s or mid 90s it would possibly get an R-rating.

Times have changed though and AVP pulled off the PG-13, but it is slightly more extreme than most PG-13 flicks. Paul Anderson is hated by legions of Horror/Sci-Fi fans and while I can’t say I like the guys work I don’t hate it. I can tolerate him, but barley. And honestly I never thought I would say to myself I wish Paul Anderson did this and while watching AVP-R I found myself wishing Anderson would have done it.

These cross over movies almost always seem to fail. Back in the 40s Universal did it with their monster movies and while some were fun none of them were as good as the monsters on their own. So when it came to AVP I wasn’t expecting anything like the movies from either series. Besides being a Vs movie it’s also a sequel to both Alien and Predator and honestly with some exceptions as a series goes on they don’t get better they might stay enjoyable if lucky. With AVP-R I was simply expecting some mindless fun, and while it was very mindless the makers forgot about the fun part.

For the hardcore fans of the Alien and Predator movies are the only ones who should watch this, but I doubt this movie will live up to your expectations. This one doesn’t correct the problems found in AVP it just creates its own and far worse problems. With better lighting AVP-R would have been better, but still not very good either.

This is one of the worst films I have ever seen (try to see) and a shameful abuse of one of the greatest movie monsters of all time. The Alien is no longer scary. Gone is the elegance. Gone is the menace and chilling patience. Made by people who know how to make FX but have no real idea about how to make a movie. I sometimes wondered if they were making fun of what had gone before, like a Zucker/Abrams flick as it seemed to veer into what could be construed as parody. Sadly, no.

I knew going in it would be bad, and that it would probably be yet another nail in the coffin of my favorite sci-fi sequels (”Alien” in my case, though I do enjoy the “Predator” films). I had seen the “redband” trailer, and stared in horror at its frenetic menagerie of 80s teen slasher clichés; I even watched the “exclusive” online clip of the film’s first five minutes, and hoped that they had been edited down from a better-paced original (as it turned out, they had not). But even so, I gave the movie a shot. Why? I’m not sure. Perhaps because if a beloved artifice that one has admired for years is to be systematically dismantled and thrown on the trash heap, one should be there to watch it burn. At least, I thought, with my expectations this low, this movie’s directors would have to try very hard to undercut them.

They did. I mean really, they must have tried hard. It takes some kind of effort to take two of the most durable mythologies in modern scifi and make them a backdrop to a pizza guy’s coming of age. Seriously. That is the only discernible story-arc in this entire film. Truth be told I could forgive even that if the characters hadn’t came pre-assembled right out of the teen movie stock barrel. Instead this film spends 40 minutes trying to make us care whether Smarmy Teen gets it off with Hot Blonde before Blond Bully Ex-Boyfriend finds out. Thank God he has Troubled Ex-Con Brother (who trumps in along with his buddy, Nice Cop) to help him out once the aliens (who arrive courtesy of “disturbing” evisceration of Happy Hunting Dad and his son, Curious Preteen) start to take out the population (such as Mumbling Bum Who No One Will Ever Believe and Dense Cop Who Keeps Looking In The Dark After Everyone Else Has Left). They soon meet up with Screaming Bereft Mother and Military Chick, who saves her daughter Cute Little Girl after her husband Wussy New Man is vivisected in line with tradition.

Honestly, with this zoo of automated plot-bots to manage, how do the aliens and the predators (actually a Predator) get a look in? Well in truth, they don’t. Very little time is spent developing either character (and let’s face it, since neither character actually talks, that isn’t surprising) and any tension built up between them is quickly dissipated as the film returns to the interminable “I Know What You Did Last Summer” slasher plot. I’m not sure what sort of budget this had but you can see that money spent on each subsequent Alien or Predator film is getting less & less, with average special effects, no name actors, bland locations & surprisingly cheap looking production values. Please stop embarrassing yourselves even further.

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